I’m noticing a spike in Disney related videos here on YouTube
I ain’t complainin I’m saying is none of y’all turkeys love dizzy more than me
I just can’t be up on here every week talking about tangled and brave
that’s gonna hurt my street cred I’ll be going to the site for I can’t be in the
middle of freestyle battle and have these dudes clowning on me
let me tell the kind of customer i was at work by eight hour shift at disney
clock out and hang out at the park for the rest of the day until the park
closes by myself
I go harder than i do miss working at it you’re not gonna like
however , there are some things I’ll miss for example i will miss how
everybody and their mom will be hit me up asking for free tickets begin phone
calls the shit fuck in the morning like hey but I’m gonna need you to meet me at
the gate tomorrow
i need about 15 passes
who is this it’s me Charlie
remember that time I gave you gum in school at one time anyways I was driving
by a playground and I saw these kids and I was like hey who wants to go to Disney
I know a guy I don’t even know any of these kids
so if you could just meet us to hold on hold on I mean you don’t put down that
night I know I shouldn’t let you guys watch my club
I don’t let me call you back but something else I missed I missed cast
member relationship drama you know make didn’t employees with only date other
I’m sure you guys have heard friends make a pact like okay if I’m single and
you’re single we both turn 30
we’re just gonna get married ok at disney here’s how it goes
if I’m single you’re single a
in I don’t know 30 seconds yeah we should date if I can wait that long i
already changed my facebook status it’s a fish
it’s faceboook a fish if you’re a straight single guy working at the
disney parks you have like a ninety-eight percent chance of getting a
girlfriend if you get hired
here’s why a number of really good looking guys around you don’t even like
girls that eliminates a lot of competition right there
and after that there’s only really two other types of straight guys left at
disney there the regular straight guys and then you have the extra happy
straight guys they usually carry around a fanny pack
just in case that the time travel back to nineteen ninety-eight they go to the
park with their kylo Ren doll and they push it around a little stroller and
they’re really concerned about trading pins and then wrong with these guys
it’s just they’re not really concerned with getting a girlfriend so I said you
have a ninety-eight percent chance but in reality that’s like a three thousand
percent chance you have of getting a girl because there’s virtually no
competition which kind of confused me because I had no girls and I was not
that guy
there’s one thing that happened to me at disney i’m sure this happened to some of
you guys you have co-workers that actually don’t put forward that much
energy or maybe before the same or even less
but they’re the ones getting rewarded so if you do anything and you like exceed
expectations you get what they call a fanatic card
everybody would get fanatic cards except for me there was one kid in the college
program who was literally breaking rules and getting fanatic cards be talking to
the manager like man remember the cheerleaders I came through last weekend
yeah of course how can I am NOT of course I do I got one of their phone
what’s going on my god amazing I went back to one of their hotel rooms
you’re saying yes to a get request I made out with her – Oh what
actually I made out with two of them you’re just showing that your team
player that’s what I love about you you work well with Mary’s you know when i
left the hotel room I stole her purse
gee willikers you’re going above and beyond the call of duty modern warfare
they had a hundred dollars in a to talk about some crack with it
that’s that’s it Batman I’m giving you a fanatic card so one day
I just got bored I wasn’t even trying to get a fanatic card right disney put this
temporary beach ball kiosk next to indiana jones and the guy was running
was actually my boy Renee
so i got this idea went over to Renee I’m like your name let me borrow one of
these beach balls son
even with a big beach balls and I walked into the theater I tell everybody hey
guys is it cool if I pack everybody section now everyone at epic hates
passing the theater when you got to get down front and yelling in front of
hey guys can you screwed in dillon dell available space everybody hates doing
I even hated doing that so i get the speech pawned it on front everyone
I need you to do me a huge favor if you guys all scooting over here i’ll do a
backflip off of this rail through everybody skirts and I get up do a
this is a three-man job I packed everybody section over 2,200 people by
Marco I go hard in the back by then once everybody was packed in since you guys
have been so awesome guess what we’ve been up for Mardi and break out the
beach ball and throw it into the crowd and everybody went crazy with the beach
EDM music festival up in this piece steve aoki shows up and starts throwing
the managers got wind of this i started doing this for every show you could tell
on their face they hated the idea that I was having so much fun
I wish you would come down here and say something I wish you would but you
cain’t and not only that after each show
renee has a line around the block of people trying to buy beach balls
get on my level this happened every weekend for three weeks in a row you
think i got a fanatic card for this not the manager is so salty
they’re making it so obvious they want to get a fanatic card Rene got a fanatic
carpets on so many beach balls
click start and a fanatic cards out to the guests in line who don’t even work
you know what fluff it two tears in a bucket one weekend I go in there I
packed the theater
what about the beach ball and then one of the AV text walks over to me and he’s
like a hey uh
what’s your name tag say other atom Aadland early and add a line
it can’t be given them the beach mall I am one that uh see with you get the tech
booth right
just write up looking right at you right over there we got buttons and
pyrotechnics in uh
the pyrotechnics had the balls flying in there and push a button my blow some
stuff up
yeah I can’t take the ball away right now because these guys are waiting for
the bass drop
ah ya know ok I how I here’s an idea how about I found the perimeter outside the
tech booth and as soon as the ball comes close
stop state farm just not going away because I mean the ball way 0 . negative
5 ounces
anyway so even if it landed in there it wouldn’t press any buttons
listen and oh no
no and after they shut down on my fun they went right back to rewarding
everybody else
oh look at Steven look at him he’s raw playing what the gasps he’s not
he’s Captain Hook a little boy and Peter Pan and the little boy stabbed him with
an imaginary sword and now he’s looking at me as well playing he’s crying bed
the little kid pretending to stab him two hours ago there’s flies buzzing
around his mouth he’s up there taking a nap
stop hating hater even get up come back to the office with me let me give you a
fanatic card
another look at him he doesn’t even want to break character for phonetic card
Stephen okay you know it’s even you just stay right here I don’t want to mess
with your mojo
I’ll go to the office i’ll come back with like 15 fanatic cards
we got from who are you guys
goober up and make you where it’s going down


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